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the fall from you is a long way down;
i've found a better way out.
Created on 2006-09-19 22:00:55 (#11189416), last updated 2009-11-02
2,216 comments received, 6,256 comments posted
Basic Account [Gift]
411 Journal Entries, 34 Tags, 80 Memories, 1 Virtual Gift, 6 Userpics
Basic Info| Name: | why am i in chains? i can't see your eyes |
|---|---|
| Birthdate: | 1988-11-22 |
| Website: | space. |
Biowinter comes, slowly, then all at once. it is brutal and unforgiving. you leave one day; your possessed body lifted itself from the cotton sheets. you stood, all eyes and thin limbs. think deer in headlights. think death standing on bony knees. he folds you up in his arms like a blanket. in a soiled dress on bathroom tile. hands numb. and then you are gone.
you reappear, skinnier than ever, in a black dress and ripped stockings. you are beautiful but you don't know it yet- you won't ever know it, not really. when he looks at you, he sees himself. you are twins, your eyesockets deep and dark, your skin pale and dampened, your freckles standing out in stark comparison. he wants to know why you are so thin. he wants to take you by your bony shoulders and shake some sense into you. tell you to stop disappearing, tell you to stop dying.
he watches you in bed, sleeping, night after night. he wants to talk to you again. tell you that your worlds have crashed together. he wants to pray to god or scream. he wants to know why this happens.
when you lie there you look like a work of art. the coke makes you hazy, like a vermeer painting. you should be hung in a museum. he misses everything about you. you remind him that he's real. he wants to tell you that, too. but you can never know that he's here. watching over you. your guardian angel.
somehow, you get lost in my disease. under the folds of fabric that hide my inability to control. i wish the thought of you was enough to keep me away. i wish i could tell you what it feels like to want to cry with everything you have, but i can't, i can't. i want to you change back into the angel you were. i want to stop believing in lies and money and sex.
i wish i could feel you. i wish you could hurt me.
flickr 43things last.fm
layout by![[info]](http://l-stat.livejournal.com/img/userinfo.gif)
movements.
you reappear, skinnier than ever, in a black dress and ripped stockings. you are beautiful but you don't know it yet- you won't ever know it, not really. when he looks at you, he sees himself. you are twins, your eyesockets deep and dark, your skin pale and dampened, your freckles standing out in stark comparison. he wants to know why you are so thin. he wants to take you by your bony shoulders and shake some sense into you. tell you to stop disappearing, tell you to stop dying.
he watches you in bed, sleeping, night after night. he wants to talk to you again. tell you that your worlds have crashed together. he wants to pray to god or scream. he wants to know why this happens.
when you lie there you look like a work of art. the coke makes you hazy, like a vermeer painting. you should be hung in a museum. he misses everything about you. you remind him that he's real. he wants to tell you that, too. but you can never know that he's here. watching over you. your guardian angel.
somehow, you get lost in my disease. under the folds of fabric that hide my inability to control. i wish the thought of you was enough to keep me away. i wish i could tell you what it feels like to want to cry with everything you have, but i can't, i can't. i want to you change back into the angel you were. i want to stop believing in lies and money and sex.
i wish i could feel you. i wish you could hurt me.
flickr 43things last.fm
layout by
movements. ConnectInterests (27):
adderall, beirut, brandon can't dance, collecting rainwater in buckets, dancing alone, dawn sprints, early morning mania, flowy dresses and skirts, free tibet!, go away ron, green tea, holga cameras, i'm lost in translation, insomnia, late night cigarettes, light leaks, making people wonder, marrying zach condon, meditation, medium format film, nothing, quirky outfits, rainbows, rasputin's secret police, running down the street, sunrises in the summer, tomorrow never lasts
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